© 2019 Beefhead Productions

Cousin Dave Chaos was raised by convicts & cops throughout his childhood. He is of a mixed mind and no one able to put him in a box. He is liberal and conservative. He is good and evil. He is a contradiction. He is clown. He tries to produce a TV show.

Addictions: Toys, candy, booze, guns, art, weird, freak, color, music, comedy & chaos.

 

COUSIN DAVE THE CLOWN

UNCLE SMARM

Uncle Smarm is Cousin Dave's Uncle. He is a multi talented know it all who forgets things all of the time. Loves to shoot photos of women, play guitar and get lost while staring at butts.

 

MISTRESS EDEN ALEXANDER

"Mistress Eden Alexander is a San Francisco native and local Delightmare. For the past 7 years she has taken the adult entertainment industry by storm as a director, producer, performer, feature entertainer, and fetish model. She currently runs her own BDSM and Fetish film studio and sessions as a professional Dominatrix. Mistress Eden also founded the Rubber Women of San Francisco, the world's first and only latex and gear club for both women & gender non conforming folks and is very involved with the local, non profit Leather and LGBTQ+ communities. In her spare time she enjoys spanking butts, tying people up, wearing lots of latex clothing, karaoke, and volunteer work. She is currently writing an album of feminist punk rock music.”

 

HONKER THE CLOWN

Honker is a clown entertainer on Circus of Chaos. She likes to carve up victims while honking her vintage horn of chaos. She unconditionally follows Cousin Dave in his unscrupulous vigilante tactics. Honker likes to play. She tends to be disturbing, but whimsical.

 

PINK CLOWN

Pink Clown loves machetes and guns and thinks the machete is the perfect kitchen utensil and killing tool in one. 

 He hates mimes and if he can ever get a hold of any invisible box piercing ammo they better watch the fuck out.

Pink Clown loves to just talk to people and win them over to the clown way one person at a time. 

Pink Clown is a pervert, loves kink and would love to spank you sometime. 

 

RAD CHAD

Rad Chad is a movie critic, Blu-ray collector and surfer. Although he openly despises Cousin Dave and his circus show, he is always pushing to get more and more airtime on the Circus of Chaos show. He is a mime lover, but ironically has been known to turn on them as well.

Addictions: Love, Life, Surf, Mimes and kale smoothies.

 

HATCHET

Hatchet is a Deinonychus Antirrhopus; a small, carnivorous therapod predator from the early Cretaceous era. His feet both have sickle-shaped claws that paleontologists believe were used to hold and eviscerate prey.

Fossil records show that Deinonychus Antirrhopus tended to hunt in packs back when the species was plentiful. Hatchet specifically used to run with a pack back in the 50's called 'The Facekicker Five.' This consisted of Hatchet and his friends Chico, Captain Boogity, Garbanzo Jones and Fufu McDiaperlegs. For years they ran together in the alley behind Unkle Funky's roller rink, but they drifted apart after McDiaperlegs' tragic death in a mobility scooter accident.

Nowadays, Hatchet is an occasional exhibit at Wednesday's Wonderium museum, and he hopes to one day fulfill his childhood dream of eating Cousin Dave's face.

 

MELISSA LAROUE

No one knows just where Melissa Laroue came from. Some stories tell of her descending from space, some say she is a super natural killing machine.  What we do know is she has unquenchable desire for all things horror.  

 

Likes: Beards, Star Wars, 90's rap music, Bruce Campbell

Dislikes: you will know!

 

FAYE FATALE

Dancer, model, actress--Circus of Chaos' resident femme fatale is a real triple threat! Often spotted in the announcer's booth, Faye is a veteran of the horror scene, following in the footsteps of such local horror hosts as Bob Wilkins and John Stanley in a pair of very high heels. Her unique combination of brains, beauty, class, and sass has made her a real fan favorite. One thing is for sure: the lady is vamp.

 

WEBBERLY

Webberly Rattenkraft transcended his humble origins as a cursed lab rat thanks to a mix of plucky determination, experimental smart drugs, and late-night access to the University's secret Forbidden Books vault. Now, in these terrible times of afactuality, he's on a mission to restore humanity's faith in Facts by harnessing the endorphin-flooding power of Fun... before it's too late."

 

LIKES: Facts, monsters & creatures, gentle hugs, horror, snacks

DISLIKES: Willful ignorance, the bad kind of human, Wet Willies, the horror of consciousness, rocking chairs.

 

THE GIMP

The gimp is a mysterious character who often is seen with Mistress Eden. The Gimp is a good sport and will participate in many activities on the set of Circus of Chaos.

 

DINKEY THE CLOWN

Dinkey is the identical twin to Winkey the clown. Dinkey is one of Cousin Dave's loyal henchmen who helps out on Circus of Chaos.

Likes: women, booze, pizza, clowns, guns, tattoos, metal, Mr Bungle, fighting and beating up mimes.

 

HELPER THE CLOWN

Helper the Clown is one of Cousin Dave's henchmen. He is known to shoot videos of unhappy people and move items around the circus set. He likes playing with machetes.

 

PIERRE THE MIME

Pierre's involvement with the Circus of Chaos sparks the upcoming war between the clowns and mimes. Mimes are evil. Mimes suck.

 

NIX

Evil twin sister to Xero, Nix is a Vampire mime where her sister Xero is a vampire clown.

 

XERO

Good twin sister to Nix, Xero is a Vampire clown where her sister Xero is a vampire mime. She loves to play, sing and spend time in the car with Karaoke.